How St. Bede's can help you

The sacraments can also be thought of as a blessing that are received during an important ceremony and are sometimes referred to as 'rites of passage' To help you prepare for the sacraments, we have produced this page to assist you. Father is happy to talk to you personally about your requirements in preparation for the sacraments, simply speak to him after Mass.

BAPTISM

Parents wants the best for their children and the best includes looking after your child's spiritual needs as well as their physical, emotional and psychological requirements. Baptism is a celebration by the Church of the child's arrival in the world, confirms the child as God's special person and is a commitment on the part of the parents to bring their child up as a member of the community of faith.

Here are some of the frequently posed questions about baptism:

Who can be baptised at St Bede's?

Any child who has at least one parent who is a practising Catholic and lives in the parish of St Bede.

What if I don't live in St Bede's parish?

If you worship regularly at St Bede's, or there is a strong family connection, or there is some other good reason (and the parish priest is the only person who can judge what is a good reason) then baptism here is possible if you have the consent of the parish priest where you live.

What if I only come to church now and again, or even not at all?

Then the answer is to start coming. You will be very welcome. At the beginning of the baptismal ceremony the parents are asked if they are going to bring their child up “in the practice of the faith”, clearly they cannot make such a commitment if they are not themselves practising the faith.

How long do I need to come before I can arrange the baptism?

Having a child baptised is not preceded by an obstacle race, or getting the right number of ticks on a report card. It is to do with faith being lived out both by trying to live a good life and by being part of the community of faith. When there is evidence of commitment, the Church will respond.

What do I have to do to arrange a baptism?

See Fr John, and he will give you a registration form to fill in. He will also arrange a date for the baptism with you. Before the baptism of your first child there is a short instruction to explain the meaning of baptism and go through the service with you. Fr John will give details of this.

What is a godparent?

A Godparent is someone who will befriend the child as they grow up and give a good example to a child in Christian living. At the beginning of the ceremony the godparents are asked: “Are you ready to help the parents of this child in their duty as Christian parents?” Although this sums up the role, remembering the child's birthday is also important.

How many godparents can we have? Two is the norm but more people can be involved.

Do the godparents have to attend church regularly? One godparent at least must be a practising Catholic.

Does the godmother hold the child at the ceremony? The practice of the godmother holding the baby arose because, in times past, mum was not part of the ceremony, which took place soon after birth because of fears for the life of the infant.These days mum or dad usually holds the baby during the ceremony and, as far as possible, both parents and the godparents support the child while the baptism is taking place at the font.

What does it cost?

There is no charge but parents may want to make a donation to the church or to Father.

What about baptism for adults?

There is usually a course of instruction for older people (over sixteen) each year. This is called the Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults – RCIA, or sometimes “Journey in Faith”. It begins in the Autumn and continues until after Easter. Baptism (or reception into the Church if the candidate has been baptised already into another Christian denomination) takes place at the Easter Vigil (the ceremony on Holy Saturday evening).

Before beginning this course it is important that people have a feel for the worship of the Church by attending Sunday Mass on a regular basis.

Information about the course will appear in the weekly bulletin.

CONFIRMATION

Confirmation at St Bede's takes place after baptism and before First Confession and First Holy Communion, following the ancient practice of the church regarding the order of the sacraments of initiation. (See Samuel Aquila, the Archbishop of Denver's Pastoral Letter, "Saints Among Us").

Confirmation is usually celebrated around Pentecost.

The parents are the teachers of the child, having been prepared for this role by Fr John. The children then follow a workbook with their parents, which Fr John looks through with the child, their parents and teachers before the celebration of the sacrament. This is not an examination, but a way of affirming the child in the work they have done.

Information about Confirmation will appear in the weekly bulletin and will also be sent out in a letter from the school.

PLEASE NOTE: Children who do not regularly attend Mass will not be able to take part in the sacramental preparation.

Adults who have not been confirmed should see Fr John. They will be invited to join the RCIA course and may be confirmed at the Easter Vigil ceremony or when the Bishop comes to celebrate the Sacrament at St Bede's around the time of Pentecost.

RECONCILIATION

Confessions at St. Bede's

SATURDAY

11:50

to

11:30

FIRST CONFESSION & HOLY COMMUNION

First Confession is celebrated in Lent, the year after Confirmation, and is followed by First Holy Communion during the Easter period.

As with Confirmation, the parents are the teachers of the child, having been prepared for this role by Fr John. The children then follow a workbook with their parents, which Fr John looks through with the child, their parents and teachers before the celebration of the sacrament. This is not an examination, but a way of affirming the child in the work they have done.

PLEASE NOTE: Children who do not regularly attend Mass will not be able to take part in the sacramental preparation.

Adults usually make their first Confession in Lent and celebrate their Confirmation and First Holy Communion at the Easter Vigil.

WEDDINGS

Congratulations. If you are able to be married in St Bede's we will do everything to ensure that the ceremony in Church is the most special occasion for you and your fiance/e and your families. Here are some of the common queries people have about weddings.

Who can marry in a Catholic Church?

Any baptised Catholic has a right to marry in their parish church (that is, the church of the parish where they live) provided they are free to marry, are not obviously too immature to take on the responsibilities of marriage, and see marriage in accordance with Catholic teaching, that is, they intend the marriage to be faithful, permanent and be open to the possibility of having children.

What if I've been married before?

You can still be married in a Catholic Church if your partner has died or if your previous marriage was declared null by the Church. If you are a Catholic and have previously married in a non-Catholic Church or registry office then please see Fr John to talk about it.If you have been married before in a marriage that is recognised as valid by the Catholic Church then you will probably not be able to marry in Church. But, again, see Fr John to talk about it.There is no such thing as a blessing in Church after a marriage in a registry office.

Who can marry at St Bede's?

Given that you are able to marry in a Catholic Church, you are able to marry here if you or your fiance/e is a baptised Catholic who lives in the parish, or who has a strong family connection with St Bede's or there is some other good reason. (Only the parish priest can judge whether there is a sufficiently good reason.)

What do you have to do?

First of all make an appointment to see Fr John and agree a date for the wedding. Please do this before you make any arrangements for a reception. You should give at least six months notice.

In good time before the wedding (but not more than twelve months before) make an appointment to see a Marriage Registrar at Riverside House, Main Street, Rotherham. They will take down your details, check ID and later issue a marriage schedule which is sent to Fr John by email. This allows him to officiate at the civil part of the religious ceremony. Fr John ensures that the signed schedule is returned to the registrar. The married couple must apply online for a marriage certificate or certificates.

If you or your partner live outside Rotherham, you will need to see the Marriage Registrar in the area where you or they live.

Fr John will give you information about the preparation which is necessary before the sacrament of marriage can be celebrated. He will also talk to you about the service, and the fees.

There is usually a rehearsal the week before the wedding, so that everyone can be familiar with their role and be relaxed for the event.

What documents do I need to bring to Fr John?

A baptismal certificate. In the case of a Catholic, this must have been issued within the previous six months. Simply apply to the church of baptism for a copy.

If either of the parties has been married and widowed, a death certificate will be required.

The decree of Nullity (letter of freedom) if a previous marriage has been declared null by the Church.

Planning the Service:

The Church usually provides an organist; other music, (soloists, choirs) can be arranged.

The official photographer is able to take photographs during the ceremony.

The service may be live streamed if requested, but due to copyright implications recorded music is not permitted. Similarly, if a video recording is desired, please note there may be copyright implications.

The church arranges the flowers of your choice and payment is usually made direct to the florist.

Please note: confetti must not be thrown in the church's grounds.

The Order of Service is as follows:

Music as the Bridal party comes into church

Welcome – Fr John

Hymn (optional)

Prayer

Reading (from Scripture)

Psalm / hymn

Second reading (from Scripture) -optional

Gospel Acclamation

Gospel

Homily

Exchange of marriage promises

Blessing and Exchange of rings

Signing of the Marriage Schedule (music / hymn)

Prayers of Intercession R./ hear our Prayer or Lord, graciously hear us

(If the celebration is a Nuptual Mass, the Eucharist begins here with the presentation of the gifts and continues in the normal way. Hymns may be sung at the Presentation of the Gifts and during the distribution of Holy Communion)

Our Father

Hymn (optional)

Nuptual Blessing

Music as bride and groom leave the church.

Appropriate music.

Music in church must reflect the solemn, sacred nature of the event. The following are offered as examples. This is not a definitive list.

Suitable Hymns for the wedding:

My God loves me

Into one we are all gathered

Lead us, heavenly Father lead us

Love divine, all loves excelling

O perfect love

The King of love my shepherd is

Guide me , O thou great Redeemer

The Lord's my shepherd

Where are love and loving kindness

A new commandment

Father, I place into your hands

Make me a channel of your peace

Amazing grace

Breathe on me, breath of God

Lord of all hopefulness

Oh Lord, all the world belongs to you

Oh, the love of my Lord is the essence

Copyright: If there is an Order of Service and the words of hymns are printed then reference must be made to the licence held by the parish for these purposes. Fr John will give details.

Suitable Readings for the wedding:

Old Testament:

Genesis 1, 26-28. 31

Genesis 2,18-24

Tobit 8, 4-8

Song of Songs 2,8-10.14.16; 8,6-7

Ecclesiasticus 26, 1-4. 13-16

Jeremiah 31, 31-34

Ruth, 1, 16-17

New Testament:

Romans 8,31-35. 37-391

Corinthians 6, 13-15. 17-201

Corinthians 12, 31-13,1

Ephesians 5,2. 21-33

Colossians 3, 12-171

Peter 3, 1-91

John 3, 18-241

John 4, 7-12

Gospel passages:

Matthew 5, 1-12

Matthew 5, 13-16

Matthew 7,21. 24-29

Matthew 22, 35-40

Mark 10, 6-9John 2, 1-11

John 15, 9-12

John 15, 12-16

John 17, 20-26

To see the texts please go to NRSV or a similar site.

FUNERALS

A funeral service or Requiem Mass (which may be preceded by a Reception into church the previous evening) is arranged by the funeral director who liaises between the family and Fr John.

Where possible a requiem Mass is scheduled for 9.30am, the time of the daily parish Mass, so that the congregation can support the family by their prayer, their responses and their singing.

Fr John will meet with family members to plan the service and discuss bible readings and music for the service at church and secular readings which may be appropriate for the end of the service or at the crematorium.

Suggestions for Readings for Funerals (Biblical)

Old Testament

Wisdom 3, 1-6.9

Micah 6, 6-8

Isaiah 25, 6-9

Lamentations 3, 17-26

Ecclesiastes 3, 1-11

New Testament

2 Corinthians 5,1.6-101

John 3,1-2

Apocalypse 14,13

Apocalypse 21, 1-7

GOSPEL

Matthew 5, 1-12

Matthew 11, 25-30

John 11, 21-27

John 12, 23-26

John 14, 1-6.

SACRAMENT OF THE SICK

The sacrament of the sick strengthens people in a time of serious illness. It can be celebrated in the home by request, or at daily mass, or in hospital.

If you are admitted to Hospital please ensure that the Chaplaincy team know you are in hospital and they will ensure that you are able to receive Holy Communion if you wish, or anointing if necessary.

The chaplaincy phone number at Rotherham District General Hospital is: 01709 304098.

BURIAL AT ST. BEDE'S

There are no plots available in the old graveyard on the west side of the Church. In some cases there is space in individual plots and these can be used.

In recent years the area on the East side of the Church has been developed as a cemetery. As space is limited only those with a close connection to St Bede's can be given permission to be buried there. The policy for the use of the new graveyard is as follows:

POLICY FOR BURIALS IN THE NEW GRAVEYARD (September 2009)

1. Who may be buried in the new graveyard:

1.1 Since space is restricted those who may be buried in a new grave in the new graveyard must also be restricted so that people who have a long association with St Bede's through their regular worship here have the opportunity to be buried here. The decision lies wholly with the parish priest who may wish to seek the advice of his predecessors, particularly when people have moved away from the parish to live their final years with relatives or in a nursing home.

1.2 The Trustees of the Diocese of Hallam do not allow the exclusive right to burial to be purchased in advance (see Diocese of Hallam, Cemeteries Policy - Appendix I) but letters of intent can be given by the Parish Priest. These must be carefully recorded and the number issued must never be more than the plots available. If the number of letter issued matches the number of plots available then forthwith only those who hold letters of intent can purchase the exclusive right to burial.

1.3 Subsequent burials in the grave are by agreement between the owner of the exclusive right, or whoever is the legal owner of the exclusive right by inheritance or gift, and the Parish Priest. Ownership of the exclusive right to burial cannot be transferred by sale or purchase.

2. Agreement with purchaser of the exclusive right to burial in a numbered plot.

2.1 The agreement will be as follows:

CERTIFICATE OF GRANT

Rev (insert name) Parish Priest, representing the Parish of St Bede, in consideration of the sum of £(insert fee) now paid by (insert name) hereby grants to the purchaser the exclusive right to burial at St Bede’s graveyard, St Bede’s Road, Rotherham in plot numbered (insert number) on the new graveyard plan.

The purchaser hereby agrees that the grave will be maintained within the graveyard which will keep its appearance as a lawn, and therefore no bordering of the grave will be allowed. A headstone may be purchased for the grave but it will be no bigger than the following dimensions: Height 3 feet (max); width 2 feet (max); depth 3 inches (min) 5 inches (max). Base 2 feet 6 inches (max). The memorial may be of any suitable stone but must be in keeping with the character of the graveyard as specified by the Parish Priest. Thus no additional accoutrement, such as vases, will be allowed.

Date of Grant............................Signed…………………………………….(insert name) Parish Priest

3. Letter of intent for those who wish to purchase at a future date. (The diocesan Trustees will not allow advance sales of exclusive right to burial.)

3.1

St Bede's Catholic Church,

Station Road,

Rotherham

S60 1HF

date

To ....

of ....

Purchase of the exclusive right to burial: LETTER OF INTENT

Dear...

Thank you for your enquiry regarding the purchase of the exclusive right to burial in a plot in the new graveyard at St Bede's for NN of YZ

The Trustees of the Diocese of Hallam do not allow purchase of this right in advance. However, it is the policy of the parish to seek to ensure that those who have a long association with St Bede's through their regular worship here and their participation in the life of the parish have the opportunity to be buried here in accordance with their clearly expressed wishes. On behalf of the parish I am able to give you this letter of intent to express the agreement that, should a plot be available at the time of your death / your relative's death then purchase of the exclusive right to burial at the cost then applicable will be available to your executor/yourself.

Please keep this letter in a safe place, but one which is known to your executors/ next of kin; and please ensure that your request is renewed each five years so records can be kept up to date.

Yours sincerely,

NN

on behalf of the parish of St Bede

3.2 Only letters of intent that can be produced will be accepted. Reported oral promises without written testimony will not be considered.

4. The charges for exclusive right to bury in a numbered plot.

4.1 It is the policy of the Diocese of Hallam, in accordance with civil law, that the price of purchase of the exclusive right to burial must command a fee at least the same as those of public cemeteries in the vicinity.

4.2 From 1st January 2023 the charges at St Bede's will therefore be as follows:Exclusive right to bury, first interment and the right to place a headstone: £2000.00 (For information purposes this includes a Minister's fee of £200.00)The burial of ashes in a casket in a full burial plot: £2000.00Subsequent interment: Grave digging £500.00

4.3 Burial of ashes in designated area: Exclusive right to bury, interment of ashes and right to place a plaque (specification and dimensions to be agreed with the Parish Priest) £400.00(Cost of plaque to be paid separately direct to Monumental Mason). Subsequent interment: Grave digging £30

4.4 The charges will be reviewed annually.

4.5 For information and comparison purposes only as of 1st April 2022 the charges of Dignity Funerals Ltd, owners of East Herringthorpe cemetery include the following:

Exclusive right to bury : £1088.00

Interment fee, new plot : £1294.00

Total New Grave (2) : £2382.00

Total New Grave (3) : £2477.00

Reopening of grave : £1294.00

Permit fee headstone : £250.00

Cremated Remains Plot : £643.00

Cremated Remains Interment Fee : £565.00

Total New Cremated Remains Plot : £1208.00

5. The keeping of records

Accurate and contemporary records must be kept, including:

A numbered plan of the graveyard, showing all available plots.

A register of who is buried in which numbered plots, date of death, date of burial.

A register of those whose ashes have been buried in the designated area, with date of death, and date of interment of ashes.

A record of the letters of intent that have been issued.